Surrosluts: A Train Fire, Extinguished Too Late (Patreon)

When your train is on fire, which of the following do you do:

1.) Stop the train, put out the fire, fix what caused the fire originally, and then get the train running again?

2.) Hold on for dear life and hope the fire puts itself out before you run out of railroad track?

For too long now, I've been aware of the fact that this train is on fire, and unfortunately, I've been holding on for dear life, when I should have been putting the fire out.

After all, it was just a 3-week trip. I could ride it out, take the heat. Then it became 6 weeks.

Then 8 weeks. Then 10. Then 12. And all the while, as those weeks just continued to grow, that fire wasn't getting any colder. Oh no, that fire had no intentions of going out.

And sitting next to that fire was getting mighty hot indeed. But I could ride it out, I continued to tell myself. I could still take the heat.

What's worse is, I DID run out of track. But instead of then putting out the fire, I instead jumped out and hurriedly laid down more track so that the train can continue to barrel onward, flames blazing out the windows.

I tried to convince myself that it would all work out.

But it didn't. It never would. It never will. Fires don't put themselves out. They keep burning until someone puts them out, or they consume everything they can.

I wish I saw this sooner. I wish I acted sooner. But I can't take the heat anymore. I am putting this fire out now.

The train that is on fire is Surrosluts. And the delays from December to January, and now January to February, weren't to put out the fire. They were to put down more track, to keep barreling on with a project that I knew desperately needed a complete rewrite.

But it's too little, too late now. I won't compromise my schedule for 2020 to put this fire out. I'm just going to let the train barrel off the track and plunge into the river.

I am going to take the two-thousand-dollar loss.

I am canceling Surrosluts.

I will revisit the idea in 2021. I think it's a great idea. I absolutely love it. And I want to do it right.

And Surrosluts, as it is written right now, does not do it right. I tried to be something I am not, tried to write in a way that I cannot write, and the quality suffered.

So while Surrosluts the project has died and will never see the light of day, Surrosluts the idea lives strong in my heart. I can't make it now, but I will make it as soon as I can. And I will do it justice. I will do all of YOU justice.

I sincerely apologize to everyone.